Resolved

Jay and I have resolved that our children are going to be nicer to each other this year.  I don't know how kosher it is to resolve something that you, by yourself, cannot accomplish but we are bound and determined to help our little family get along better. 

The kids have seemed to get gradually worse about picking at each other, calling each other names and just being frustrating.  There are many evenings that I have gone to bed at a loss as how to get to a place where things are generally peaceful. 

The solution - they pay.  Money.  They will be charged for being mean to each other, calling each other names and excessive teasing.

Jay bought two big Mason jars.  Each child has a different color puffball.  Each time they violate current family policy, the jar with the frowny face gets a puffball matching the color of the offending child.  Each Monday night during Family Home evening, they pay up.  Tonight, William owed $2.25, Henry owed $1.75 and Tessa owed a quarter.  They cannot earn this money back and we haven't exactly decided what to do with it yet.  However, in the week we have been doing this, I have noticed a difference.  Contention has decreased, which is the whole point of the exercise anyway.

Also, because we want to catch them being good we have a reward system in place.  The second Mason jar has a smiley face on it and any time we catch them being good - being nice to each other, helping each other, doing a good deed without being asked - they can add a puffball.  Once we fill up the "good" jar, we will do a fun family activity together.  So far they are doing things like taking out the garbage and recycling without being asked and helping each other at school. 

So basically we are taking money away from the kids for being naughty.  We honestly didn't know what else to do and they seem fairly reluctant to part with their not-so-hard-earned allowance.  We shall see how it all turns out.